Sunday 5 June 2016

It's still an anniversary

I know a lot of people will say it doesn't count but I disagree.  Fifty years is fifty years.  And an anniversary is just that.  So, regardless of what anyone thinks, today I celebrate my 50th wedding anniversary.  As I was actually married for only half that time the celebrations will be a bit half hearted, but I no longer have  the inclination for celebrations on the grand scale.

I've reflected on those 50 years and am thankful that there have certainly been a lot more good than bad.  A lot.  The difficult times are a mere flash in that time span.  I have four terrific offspring and six grandchildren I adore.  I'm basically healthy and definitely happy.  

I have no regrets and firmly believe there's no point dwelling on the past and what might have been.  Woulda, coulda, shoulda I call it.  Who knows where any one of thousands of different decisions would have taken me?  I could be better off than I am now but, then again, I could be a hell of a lot worse off, too.   

I've forgotten a lot of it but still remember the bits that were important to me so that, alone, is reason for celebration.  Or I think I do.  Maybe I just remember the bits I choose to remember and have binned the rest.  I still remember the joke one of my uncles told at my wedding reception. 

Songs that were popular then have stood the test of time. Remember When A Man Loves A Woman and Frank Sinatra crooning Strangers in the Night. Pretty Flamingo by Manfred Mann.   I doubt very much if today's brides will remember todays pop songs on their 50th wedding anniversary.  Or maybe I'm showing my age with that comment.  

I think I'll bust out some Frank Sinatra to add to the atmosphere.
 

17 comments:

  1. Well there's one helluva lot of thought provoking stuff in that Pauline. Of course I've heard of the songs (who hasn't?) but yes I, too shall reflect on that sentiment in future. I may not have as many offspring (and no blood grandchildren as yet either) but there were good times and I rarely forget those.

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    1. Life is pretty darn good, all the better for the surprises. Thanks to your friendship, we've shared some of those good times. And 50 years ago we didn't have the technology for us to meet. Happy days!

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  2. Yes a lot to reflect on. Sometimes we look back on life choices and think we might have done it differently, but I can never wish away the good times, the spin offs - particularly my own four children and the house I live in happily today. I am glad you are healthy and happy and blessed...

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    1. Thanks, Fi. We are indeed lucky if we can count our blessings.

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  3. Happy anniversary then, Pauline! As I never got married I have no wedding anniversary to celebrate, but in principle I agree. I do sometimes wonder what different directions life might have taken IF this, that or the other; but I don't really dwell on it, as there is no answer. Had I made other choices, I'd have missed out on certain experiences and people I'm very thankful for. And as for what or who there might have been instead, if I'd chosen another path... No one knows!

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    1. Yes, the principle is the same, Monica. No point dwelling on the "woulda, coulda, shoulda". It just takes our focus away from the moment which is all we have really.

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  4. Happy anniversary then, Pauline! As I never got married I have no wedding anniversary to celebrate, but in principle I agree. I do sometimes wonder what different directions life might have taken IF this, that or the other; but I don't really dwell on it, as there is no answer. Had I made other choices, I'd have missed out on certain experiences and people I'm very thankful for. And as for what or who there might have been instead, if I'd chosen another path... No one knows!

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  5. This is life. Beginnings, endings, regrets, and precious memories. I am thankful I remember as much as I can these days. It means I lived.

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    1. I agree, Tabor. And I'm thankful to have lived such a happy life.

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  6. It doesn't seem strange to me at all, Pauline. It was an important day, 50 years ago. A lot of life's treasure and pleasure have come to you because of that day 50 years ago. The songs - oh yes. I remember them too.

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    1. I've had Pretty Flamingo swirling in my head for 24 hours accompanied by all sorts of memories of life's treasures and pleasures as you so aptly put it. I like that expression!

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  7. Congratulations on your 50th anniversary. Yes be proud and happy. My 50th was on May 21 and although there was no formal celebration we had many best wishes. Yes it seems like yesterday.

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    1. It may be weird but I've never forgotten that anniversary date and pause each year to reflect on my emotional wellbeing. I hope you and your wife have many more happy years together.

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  8. Hi Pauline!
    This post resonates with me so much! It would have been my 32nd wedding anniversary in Feb, if things had been different. I don't regret the outcome of the 14 difficult years I was with him as I have 4 wonderful children as a result. Although I have 4 gorgeous grandchildren also, I long for the day we are all able to see them. I can say that I made a point of making sure my children had wonderful memories (even when their angry father was around).
    Happy 50th to you and don't feel you can't celebrate! I too, reflect every February 12th... but, like you, I reflect on the good not the bad. :)

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    1. Hi Liz, We all have anniversaries, some we don't mention often and some that mean something to us alone. Some things are best forgotten, aren't they?

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  9. It was a big day and its impact on your life is worth stopping and reflecting upon.

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    1. I agree. I cannot imagine a different life. Wouldn't want a different life.

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